| THE SALEM INTRUDER Headlines for this Week's Edition SALEM'S TOP TABLOID! SANTA SUES SALEM FOR CHANGING DATE OF CHRISTMAS! AHNOLD ACCUSES DIMERAS OF SKI SABOTAGE! EJ IMPLICATED IN POISONED SPY CASE! EJ ALSO ADMITS TO BEING ON DUKE LACROSSE TEAM! MEGA-SHOCKER: CASTRO IS WILLOW FAN! GERALDO CLAIMS VICTOR’S BASEMENT HAS AL CAPONE’S VAULTS! STEFANO DISCOVERED TO HAVE MORE COMEBACKS THAN ROCKY! ROCKY SINKS INTO DEEP DEPRESSION! IL DIVO SERENADE PHILIP AS NEW FACE UNMASKED! SAMI BRADY IS NEXT BOND GIRL! NICK: I WAS CHER’S BOY TOY! QUEEN STARTS EJAMI PETITION! PATRICK CONFESSES TO REPLACING PAGES OF DIALOGUE WITH OLD SCRIPTS FROM INDIANA JONES, DALLAS, AND THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW! BORAT AND KATE ELOPE! |
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| December 24, 2006 Salem's Weather: Santa Stefano has windy warning for ANYONE WHO LIFTS ANY OF THESE JOKES! |